WHAT A LAZY LOT! THEY’RE UNAMBITIOUS AND DREAD WORK!

The problem with my comrades is that they’re lazy and lack foresight.

The semester in several campuses just came to an end, and I asked a comrade of mine what he plans to do for the five months he’ll be on holiday. I couldn’t believe my ears when he replied that he was taking a vacation in Mombasa.

A five-month vacation? What in a working nation is that for? And five months from what exactly? Speed-dialing your cannabis supplier, fornicating with flavoured condoms, twerking your morals away, and cribbing exams off the internet? Dimwit, you just finished a semester, not the twelve labours of Hercules for Christ’s sake!

I shared my vexation with Grandpa Richard and as expected, the old man was not impressed. “In my days, if you went to Mombasa for five months, it was to offload bags of cement at the port and not to ogle at half-naked tourists on the beach while recuperating from the fatiguing trials of being a mollycoddled youth,” Reminisces the pensioner.

“In my view, your comrades ought to look for menial jobs so they can pull Kenya’s economy out of the toilet,” Grandpa tells me. “All a young person will find at the coast is sea water diluted with cocaine dumped beneath it, male house-helps who dress as women and cats that get stuck in containers.”

When my comrades are out of school, work seems to be the only four-letter word that doesn’t exist in their vocabularies. They’d prefer to slouch on the couch watching endless re-runs of soaps and detergents on TV instead of hitting houses Jehovah Witness style hawking toilet paper.

Don’t believe any of that “There are no jobs in Kenya” street-talk. It’s nothing but balderdash, used as an excuse by my comrades who are the least ambitious generation to walk on this side of the Sahara. They lack the moxie and determination to pursue any job that’ll require them to put their asininity aside. Truth be told, I don’t blame the Chinese for grabbing every tender that had initially been reserved for the youth. They (the Chinese) are simply taking advantage of our laziness and lack of foresight.

Another asinine way of spending their holidays is by catching the Zzzzs. Instead of cutting grass and helping out with household chores, these chubby dimwits sleep for more than 18 hours a day in their parents’ homes. My grandpa recalls that as a young man, he only slept for four hours. And that’s when his father didn’t ask him to guard the compound against night runners and nocturnal cassava thieves. Flip the coin to the current situation, and you’ll agree with me that we’re on our way to damnation.

No matter how hard lecturers at institutions of higher learning try to drill economics into my comrades’ noggins, they will only ever understand it halfway—the demand part. They don’t strive for anything—and that’s because they’ve been given everything.

@JowalJones

Lukorito Jones

Lukorito Jones is a columnist and correspondent with Kenya's leading newspaper, Daily Nation. He also dabbles in fiction works at times, hoping to be the next Stephen King. Sometimes he takes time out from writing to perfect his deer-dancing and goat-screaming skills.

4 Comments:

Leave a comment & you will live happily ever after!