DEFINING THE RELATIONSHIP
DECIBELS OF INSANITY
COMRADES IN UNIFORM? NOT SUCH A BAD IDEA

A few weeks ago, a noble suggestion was mooted that university students be clothed in uniforms. In their usual fashion of opposing everything that has a lick of common sense, my comrades received the proposal with hue and cry. “The reprehensible nonsense that passes for dressing nowadays is a brazen…
A COMRADES’ GUIDE TO PASSING AN INTERVIEW
A COMRADES’ GUIDE TO BECOMING EMPLOYABLE
DON’T BREAK UP! CONSIDER TAKING A BREAK INSTEAD.
COMRADES PIERCINGS FREAK ME OUT!

There is a weird trend slowly gaining ground among campus reprobates that’s giving me the willies. It is a curious blend of self-destruction and asininity; an unexplainable macabre desire to mutilate one’s body by perforating every single orifice. Pray, why would one choose to add 18 extra holes onto their…
MY COMRADES AND THEIR POOR READING CULTURE!
BETTING ON FOOTBALL? HOW SILLY!
HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU’RE FALLING IN LOVE?
Love is the spice that adds flavor to our humdrum lives; without it living would lose all meaning. It is worthwhile for each and every member of humanity to fall in love at least once in their lifetime. But how do you know you’re falling in love with someone and…
CAMPUS DIVA? OH, PLEASE!
OF COMRADES’ BIG BOOTIES AND BLEACHED SKINS
THEY DON’T UNDERSTAND ROMANCE, THESE COMRADES OF MINE

It seems that morals and common-sense are not the only things that have fled from my comrades. Cupid too has joined the bandwagon and deserted the youngsters, leaving behind a generation devoid of courtship values, romance and a squat of true love. Relationships among my comrades are like houses built…
COMRADES, ENOUGH OF THIS GRATUITOUS VIOLENCE!
OF SOCIAL MEDIA ATTENTION SEEKERS
COMRADES’ TATTOOS THAT MAKE ME SICK!
WHAT A LAZY LOT! THEY’RE UNAMBITIOUS AND DREAD WORK!
THEY’RE ASININE POLITICIANS, THESE COMRADES OF MINE

Whoever came up with the expression ‘Politics is a dirty game’ must have been an observer of campus elections. This is because my comrades’ p rimal nature never shines brighter than when they are electing their next bunch of leaders. During this period, comrades are ever volatile, highly charged, and…
It’s Hilarious Pornography, not Choreography

While attending an alumni function at a local university, my old man Grandpa Richard accidentally walked into the institution’s students’ centre and immediately froze on his tracks. What the pensioner saw shocked him to the core. My comrades were flailing around like retarded rabbits hopped up on rabies and hormones,…
MY COMRADES AND THEIR POOR GRAMMAR MAKE ME FURIOUS
They’re higher than Kites, these Comrades of mine
IT’S ALWAYS A BAD HAIR DAY IN CAMPUS
HOW TO SPEND VALENTINE’S DAY IF YOU’RE SINGLE
Valentine’s Day is probably the most romantic day of the year. On this day, all living creatures pair up and use the opportunity to splash gifts, flowers and chocolates on each other. This Friday is the day designated to show love for the person who makes your heart go ‘kedike’,…
SHOULD YOU CONFESS TO CHEATING IN A RELATIONSHIP?
Infidelity is highly repulsed and shunned in most relationships. Couples usually work hard to remain committed and faithful to one another. If you truly love your partner, you will surely strive to practice zero-grazing, even when you feel the grass might be greener on the other side. But let us…
IS YOUR PARTNER TAKING YOU FOR GRANTED?
A GUIDE TO FINDING LOVE & KEEPING IT
Have you ever felt that you’re cursed when it comes to love? Have all your previous relationships come to a tragic end, leaving you distraught, bitter and vengeful? Had you initially lost your faith in love? If so, then I have some good news for you: You have the power…
OVERCOMING JEALOUSY IN A RELATIONSHIP
Jealousy can be considered as one of the most common of all human emotions; and rightfully so. Though many of us are reluctant to admit it; we all feel jealous and insecure every once in a while in our relationships, no matter how solid they are. People usually succumb to…
SIGNS THAT YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS COMING TO AN END
We all know that love is the sweetest thing ever. But most often than not, relationships turn out in ways we hadn’t anticipated. The love that once bound us together now becomes contaminated, and we start toying with the idea of calling it quits. Most people have the ability of…
OF TALL AFRICAN MEN AND BIG BOOTY
SHOULD YOU LET THEM KNOW YOU’RE IN LOVE WITH THEM?
When you met at first, you never thought anything more than friendship would develop between the two of you. Then like a bolt from the blue, it strikes. You wake up one morning and realize that you’re in love with them. How did it even happen? You wonder. Oh, my!…
THINKING ABOUT GETTING BACK WITH YOUR EX?
Deciding whether to end a relationship or hold on is one of the toughest choices we usually have to make when it comes to affairs of the heart. But what’s even tougher is pondering on lifting the reverse gear and ignite the once dead flame with your ex. Getting back…
IS IT POSSIBLE TO FIND TRUE LOVE ONLINE?
Is it really possible to find true love online? I set out looking for an answer to this question and got varied responses. First came the lamentations about online relationships that have gone awry. Sebastian, a 22 year old Kenyatta University student, was utterly against the idea of dating someone…
OF ASININE COMRADES AND THEIR CAMPAIGNS
The Mugendalets are at it again. This time, they’ve effectively crossed the threshold from being a reprehensible minute institution full of primitive energy to being an international (I blame this on Thika Road) institution still full of primitive energy. Their primal nature has never shone brighter than when students are…
BRINGING THE SPARK BACK TO YOUR LOVE
All relationships start with a bang. At the commencement of love, couples are all excited with each other and full of vibrant energy. However, as time goes by; the once vivacious flames of love are reducing to just glows and before you know it, the union becomes flat and cold.…
DEFYING LONG DISTANCE IN LOVE
DEFYING LONG DISTANCE IN LOVE By Jowal Jones Wanja*, an ardent reader of this column, wrote me an interesting email last week. Her fiancé had just won a scholarship to pursue his scholarly dreams in the UK. While this was indeed a great achievement, Wanja was not entirely happy and…
DO NOT LET THAT BREAK-UP BE YOUR BREAK-DOWN
Love is considered by many as that special spoonful of sugar that sweetens life. It runs like a river between our hearts, quenching our souls’ thirst. However, sometimes in a blink of an eye, this life’s sweetener can metamorphose into a vile and sour concoction. The river of love can…
FEAR NOT; JUST FALL IN LOVE
Who doesn’t appreciate the magical feeling of being in love? Love, God’s gift to humanity, is a cake so sweet that everyone is yearning to taste a piece of it; right? We all want to be overcome by feelings of warmth, care and affection, don’t we? My opening paragraph may…
REJOICE; AND AGAIN I SAY REJOICE!
ASK AND IT SHALL BE GIVEN UNTO YOU
Several years back, my brother and I used to attend different boarding schools. A day before the opening date, father would ask us to write a shopping list of things we needed for the school term. He would then travel to the nearby town and buy for us the items…
OF ASININE FORNICATION AND OVERPOPULATION
Ladies and gentlemen, it is with deep regret and a long face that I stand before you this fateful day. I am sorry to be the poll-bearer of sad news, and believe you me; it pains me to the deepest point of my spirit. The world’s procreation industry has…
DON’T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF
The reason why most people lead unhappy lives these days is because they pay too much attention to just the wrong things. They focus and concentrate on small stuff that should never be a priority at all. Things that while at the surface it may seem normal to pay close…
They’re Higher Than Kites; These Comrades of Mine
My comrades are on drugs. They’re hopped up on ecstasy, hyped by Bluemoon Vodka, topped up on Cannabis Sativa, puffing on sheesha and acting like a bunch of marauding dim-wits on a midterm break from the Mathare Institute of the Insanely Profane. It’s disgraceful and makes me really furious. You…
Amicus Scrabblae
Everyday, I get more and more convinced that the only reason why grown men play scrabble is because it’s the only socially acceptable way to explore their curiosity about jumping onto other men. For those who don’t know what scrabble is, gather around me as I explain to you the…
Know your Professor
Am that type of a person who would rather skip class and catch up later on my own. Not that I am a genius or anything, as my virtuosity itself has been hovering around rock bottom. It’s just that am the kind of a person who would rather bunk class…
A NIGHT RUNNER AMIDST US?
This is a story that happened some few years back, when I was in classseven about five years ago, and I know you will find it reallyinteresting.I attended a boarding school that happens to be located deep in theheart of Western Province. It is in one of those far off…
Stopping Kony: Charity begins at home.
A friend of mine who stays in the USA invited to me to an event on Facebook called Cover the Night. When I visited the page for the event, I found out that thousands of people had been invited too. What could this popular event be? I wondered to myself.…