LOVE IS GREAT, BUT FOOD IS MORE IMPORTANT


The other day I entered a bus and as is the norm, the radio happened to be on at an uncomfortable full-blast. As I heaved my body among the passengers towards an empty seat at the back, I couldn’t help but catch the tail-end of a melancholic love song, which must have been playing on Classic FM. By the way, did Governor Kidero issue a transport directive that all matatus plying within Nairobi should have their radios tuned to Classic FM and not any other station? But I digress.
Back to that melancholic love song. I only happened to hear the last two lines of it, and the song was over before I could pull out my brand new iPhone to Shazam it (Sorry guys, I don’t own an iPhone). Anyway, those two lines at the tail-end of the song went something like, “I will do anything to fall in love/ I will do anything to fall in love.”
That song left a train of thoughts cruising within my cerebellum (I know my Biology folks!). Did that guy really know what he was singing about? The man will do anything just to fall in love? By anything, is taking up a career as a cartoonist in France included? How about flying aboard an Asian plane? Jokes aside, the Chinese have a pretty serious saying that goes something like, “Be careful what you wish for.”
tumblr_masn8hk2Lh1rya2qqo1_500Thinking about the poor guy that sung that song, coupled with the fact that the conductor was staying too long with my change, made me fidgety during the entire bus ride to Runda. Runda is short for Ruiru Ndani by the way, for the novices. I actually turned to the burly man sitting next to me and asked him whether he would do anything for love, including auditioning for the Soko Ugali advert and listening to Jaguar’s jam. He didn’t answer me. He just cracked his knuckles and gave me a look that would have scared even the devil himself.
So I decided to approach one of my exes for an opinion on this crazy little thing called love. Isn’t that the epitome of irony? Asking for advice about love from someone whose love that you shared crumbled?
According to this ex of mine, love is but a business. We all enter into businesses so as to make profits, she says. If you discover that you’re actually making losses in whatever venture you’re in, then it is best advised to cut your losses and flee. And how do you know you’re making losses? Simple—a business makes losses when the drawings exceed the investments.
So let’s try and apply that to love. Two parties are both in love with only one aim—to make profits for themselves. And if at any instance one partner discovers they’re operating at a loss, then it’s time for them to end the relationship. And how does it dawn upon them that they’re making losses? When what they’re gaining from the relationship is far much less than what they’re investing in it in terms of time and resources.
Gosh! Love has long become economics with balance sheets and all? How comes I never got the memo?
Though I refuse to believe that love should be treated as a business entity (I’ve always been poor in maths), I also refuse to believe one should do anything for love. You are allowed to move heaven and earth in such of food but for love? I’m still waiting for another opinion on that one.

jowaljones

Jowal Jones is a columnist and correspondent with Kenya's leading newspaper, Daily Nation. He also dabbles in fiction works at times, hoping to be the next Stephen King. Sometimes he takes time out from writing to perfect his deer-dancing and goat-screaming skills.