OBAMA VISIT UNLOCKS COMRADES’ PRIMITIVE ENERGY

Share this on WhatsApp You couldn’t have been more wrong if you thought that the chaps locked up in that asylum along Thika Road are Kenya’s mentally challenged. The real mentally profane are actually found in our institutions of higher learning; those at Mathari have simply been misread. My old…

Continue reading

WE HAVE A RIGHT TO BOOZE!

Share this on WhatsApp We, the comrades from Kenya’s institutions of higher learning, stand united today in condemnation of the recent directive issued by the President against alcohol manufacturers and consumers. The directive, which has seen both legitimate and comrade-friendly illegitimate beer destroyed in the past few days, has plunged…

Continue reading

THE SHAME OF COMRADES IN SHABAAB’S PAYROLL

Share this on WhatsApp The previous week has seen my comrades’ moral fibre come under heavy scrutiny from a number of sources.  Instead of opening books and spreading knowledge, my comrades of the fairer sex have run the gauntlet of social media for allegedly opening legs and spreading syphilis, once…

Continue reading

WHAT I WISH KENYAN STUDENTS KNEW ABOUT PORNOGRAPHY

Share this on WhatsApp There’s nothing in the world that beats the feeling of having to share a meal with my old man, Grandpa Richard. I always look forward to such rare occasions as he recounts stories from the halcyon days when night-runners didn’t arm-twist the government to recognize them…

Continue reading

THE BLUEBAND GENERATION NEEDS TO TOUGHEN UP

Share this on WhatsApp A week ago, popular columnist Njoki Chege shook the blogosphere with a piece that claimed today’s cohort of young men has increasingly become spineless, lazy and ambitionless. She referred to the ill-fated generation as Blueband boys, which I assume was an inference to what they were…

Continue reading

HILARIOUS LIES MY COMRADES TELL TO GET LAID

Share this on WhatsApp Giving credit where it’s due, I must say my comrades are very creative fellows. However, they all seem to apply this creativity in asinine ways such as innovating habits of cheating in exams and inventing new methods of ingesting marijuana.(Read: They’re higher than Kites; these comrades…

Continue reading

GRAFFITI IS NOT ART

Share this on WhatsApp My comrades usually invent the most ludicrous ways in which to “express themselves.” When they’re not being opprobrious to motorists by throwing stones across major highways, you will find them mutilating their skins with anchors and dragon tattoos which they will have the temerity to call…

Continue reading

FORGET OKOA KENYA; IT’S MY COMRADES THAT NEED SAVING

Share this on WhatsApp Last week, CORD launched the Okoa Kenya drive, an initiative that they promise will deliver the country from insecurity, devolution and corruption woos. While welcoming this latest gimmick in Kenya’s political circus, my old man, Grandpa Richard, is of the opinion that politicians are barking up…

Continue reading