BETTING ON FOOTBALL? HOW SILLY!


The World Cup is here with us. In its wake, it has brought about increased raucousness and alcohol imbibing in copious amounts among my comrades. It is also keeping them awake past the midnight, something that does not quite sit well with my old man, Grandpa Richard.

You’d think that my comrades would be content with the inebriation and self-induced insomnia that accompanies the world’s greatest sporting tournament. But apparently, that’s not enough for them anymore. They are always looking for a new asinine thrill, and this time they’ve found it in betting.

Driven by voracious greed and the allure of doubling their money, comrades would stake everything upon a world cup match. They watch the games in seedy pubs all hopped up on sheesha and the gambling bug; wagering their parents’ and taxpayers’ (in the case of HELB) cash.

“When I was a boy people didn’t gamble,” Recalls Grandpa Richard. “The only risk a young person made was coming to Nairobi for college. That’s because we were afraid of muggers and at risk of losing our morals to the city,” Explains the retiree.

Today’s comrades gamble boisterously. They pin all their hopes on Neymar and when he fails to score they lose everything, plunging them into long-term penury. My sincere (but unfortunately belated) condolences to comrades who have lost everything as a result of frittering away their shillings on a loser’s bet.

“During my college days, I put my pocket money in a savings account with compounded interest, not on the World Cup,” Continues grandpa. “If I wanted to double my money I got a part-time job, none of that Brazil versus Germany nonsense.”

When comrades run out of money, they still gamble with the most bizarre of items. Last week after Brazil edged Chile out of the tournament, I watched in disbelief as comrades fought over a girl. The lass in question was the girlfriend to a Chile fan. According to the terms of their bet, the guy’s mate, who was supporting Brazil, got to sleep with the Chile fan’s girlfriend if Brazil won. If you ask me, both boys ought to be arrested for human trafficking!

But the worst part about this unbridled betting is that it tricks my comrades into believing they could actually become billionaires without any real investment.  They’re wagering their future on pipe dreams and easy money. The emergence of online betting sites is only exacerbating the situation. Get this comrades: Luck will never triumph over hard-work. It is time we chock off this betting craze before it turns into a national disaster.

Grandpa Richard is not prone to speculating, but he stakes that the only get-rich-quick scheme that will work for my comrades is saving up on their booze and tattoos, concentrating on their studies, getting meaningful and legal jobs, and then investing wisely afterwards.

I am willing to bet my house (hypothetical at this point) on the odds of 10 to 1 that time will prove Grandpa Richard right.

 

@JowalJones

jowaljones

Jowal Jones is a columnist and correspondent with Kenya's leading newspaper, Daily Nation. He also dabbles in fiction works at times, hoping to be the next Stephen King. Sometimes he takes time out from writing to perfect his deer-dancing and goat-screaming skills.